Trust is one of the building blocks of a healthy and stable
relationship. Without it, a relationship crumbles under the
weight of suspicion and disrespect. When you've had something
happen in your relationship or the one prior to your current
one, you already know how important it is that you built trust
for your security. Here are some ways to add trust to your
relationship.
Make sure that what you say is what you're saying
It takes a lot to hold back some of your opinions sometimes. But
when you hold back something important, your partner will see it
in your body language. It's better to tell them what is
upsetting you than for them to have to guess what you are trying
to tell them - and potentially guessing wrong.
Become more predictable
It's the sudden changes that can cause even the most calm and
centered person to begin to question their partner. If you're
doing something that might be perceived as 'out of your
character,' realize that you might be causing suspicion. Try to
keep your habits and actions fairly predictable so that your
partner can assume that everything is okay when your patterns
remain the same.
Be open about changes that you are making
But it's not fair to assume that you will be staying the same
all of the time, so it's best to let your partner know when you
are making changes that might seem radical. Starting a new
exercise program or changing your overall look might be
something that you will want to warn them about - lest they
think that you're primping and preparing your appearance for
someone else.
Believe in your partner
A little faith in your partner will go a long way. When you want
to build trust in a relationship, you will want to trust your
partner as well to make decisions that benefit your relationship
as well as your well-being. It isn't about thinking that your
partner can do anything that they put their mind to, but it's
about having the courage to say that you support your partner no
matter what they want in their life.
Communicate your needs
What you need will go a long way to showing your partner how
much you trust them. By allowing them to see what makes you
happy, you are becoming vulnerable to them and to their
reactions. They might not like what you've decided, though they
probably will appreciate the fact that you are telling them what
you need from them. Trusting them to listen and to respect these
needs will help the favor to be returned.
Be an open book
Keeping secrets is probably one of the worst things you can do
for a relationship. You need to be as open as possible in your
marriage in order to show that you have nothing to hide. When
you're open, your partner will also feel that they should be
open enough to you as well. Small secrets are one thing - gifts,
surprises - but when you start to keep some secrets, they might
think that you're hiding other things as well.
Be yourself
You married the person that you are with because of who they
are. When they start to act differently, that might make you
question what is going on with them. When you want to rebuild
the trust in your relationship, try to remember that you don't
want to change or impress them, but you want to show them who
you really are so that they can trust that person.
Have your own opinions
It's interesting that many people believe that agreeing with
everyone will make them seem more trustworthy. But like 'yes
men' in business, those that always agree seem to be lying some
of the time. There's no need to disagree with others, but you
should also have your own opinions once in a while.
Establish clear boundaries
Set up boundaries that might allow you to feel more trustful. If
your spouse or partner is away, you might establish rules for
talking to other women or let them know things that might make
you uncomfortable. Share what you need to feel secure in your
relationship and ask them to do the same.
Don't be afraid of success
Realize that you can have an open and honest relationship - it's
not impossible. Too many people dismiss the idea entirely and
always look for things to be wrong - however, this leads to
distrust as well.
Communicate often
Take the time to talk with each other frequently so that you
both know where the other one is at. This will allow you to feel
as though there is nothing that you're not communicating to the
other.
Take responsibility
If you keep a secret or lie, take responsibility for your
blunder. People make mistakes, but owning up to them makes you
better for it.
Article by- Cucan Pemo
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